Curiouser and curiouser
This is purely a Brexit rant. I am not a fan of Brexit. If that sort of thing bores you then move along, nothing to see here.
The Ermine sits in his eyrie surveying the discombobulation that is Brexit in puzzlement. It was all supposed to be so easy in 2016. I’m reminded of that cartoon of the guy in the signalbox 1 watching train wrecks all around, muttering that’s no way to run a railroad.
Funny old crew, Brexiters. Despite the Leave conspiracy theory that it’s all Remainers wot are doing the wrecking, I think the most useful idiots in this game, from a Remainer point of view, are the misnamed European Research Group 2 . These are professional wreckers, the 21st century equivalent of Red Robbo and his crew at British Leyland. With top hats and Eton accents. I’d also remind Leavers that theirs is a broad church that contains two diametrically opposed constituencies.
One of the tenets of Brexit fundamentalism is that there should be no backsliding on 2016. There was a single vote in June 2016, they got the result they wanted, that is the fundamentally determined fricking will of the people and shall stand for all time despite the bullshit said on all sides.
Brexiters don’t walk the talk, though. They always want a place to row back when they screw up. After the European Research Group failed to depose Theresa May last year, they are barred from having another go until December. Let’s hear it from the pusillanimous punk Mark Francois, vice chair of this bunch of rich spivs.
When we had an official vote of confidence prior to Christmas and 117 colleagues voted against the PM, we did not know at that time that she would be getting into bed with a Marxist with the prospect of a customs union and breaching the 2017 manifesto. Had we known that, I’m sure the vote against would be far higher. Now that everything has changed, I believe it is appropriate that colleagues should be asked again.
Well hah flippin’ har Mark me old mate, you best watch where you’re going with this. While we can all admire someone who channels John Maynard Keynes 3
When my information changes, I change my mind, What do you do, sir?
obviously while this sort of revisionism doesn’t apply to the Leave vote, it does apply to ERG clever clogs trying to defenestrate the current Dear Leader of their party for consorting with the enemy. She’s got to go, ever since generally going off their message that a no deal Brexit is the best Brexit to be had. It’s all been turned up to 11 since 2016. What does the capable mother Andrea ‘Loathesome‘ Leadsom inform us about those sunny uplands promised in 2016? It would be not nearly as grim as people think. The direction of travel is all wrong round here…
Mark, since now everything has changed and all that shit on the side of Boris’s Bus seems to have turned out a load of cock, maybe this revisionism might also apply to the Great British People? Sauce for the goose and all that?
I don’t think Brexiters have anything to fear from another referendum. It appears that very few Leavers have changed their minds, but the great advantage of having another referendum is that they can confirm their desire for economic hara kiri, heck we can even give form to the method of leaving the EU, which is May’s Withdrawal Agreement, so they know what they will be buying. Unlike the original referendum which left the exact form of leaving the EU as an exercise for the reader, this one is clear. It’s actionable, it’s deliverable if they tippex the dates a little bit, and hell, it’s even agreed with the other side. What’s not to like? It’s a fair one-two punch – first vote to leave, which let every man and his dog project their hopes and fears onto the inchoate void of the unknown. Now we have turned the unknown into something that is Known, do you really want to fuck this up like that? Answers on a ballot paper, please.
Talking of channelling Let’s hear it from the ERG top brass, Jacob Rees-Mogg. What does he have to say about Britain? Basically, as a country we have the character and integrity of Humpty Dumpty
“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.”
Jacob Rees-Mogg, channeling Humpty Dumpty. Or is that the other way round. It’s difficult to tell, these days
Jake twat thusly
Parliament cannot bind its successors, the Prime Minister’s promises have not invariably proved reliable and there has been little sincerity from the EU.
Jacob Rees-MoggHumpty Dumpty
Femi summarised it pretty well
Wow. You just basically told a foreign leader that our country can’t be trusted,
Interesting country to do business with, this ‘ere Brexit Britain, with the ERG crew at the wheel.
One should always listen to the other side, so here’s Brexitcentral on the subject of the ERG – fine and reasonable men to a T, in fact they are so accommodating they border on quislings.
And when the history of this period is written, the ERG – the real mainstream of Leavers – will be viewed as flexible beyond belief in the face of a Government that treated them with nothing but suspicion and disdain.
You really couldn’t make this shit up.
Running hard to stay still
Original plan was to save this for Friday, yet another been and gone deadline by the looks of it. But the spaffage from the Brexit ultras keeps on coming. Let’s hear it from Mark Francois again
“If, however, you attempt to hold us in the European Union against the democratically expressed will of the British people then, in return, we will become a “Trojan horse” within the EU, which would utterly derail all your attempts to pursue a more federal project.
“A new Conservative government, led by someone like Boris Johnson or Dominic Raab, might vote down your budget, veto your attempts at greater military integration, and generally make it impossible for you to bring about the more federal project in which you so desperately believe” …
So my earnest message to the European council is simple. Brexit has already gone on long enough.
If you now try to hold on to us against our will, you will be facing Perfidious Albion on speed. It would therefore be much better for all our sakes if we were to pursue our separate destinies, in a spirit of mutual respect.
Oh the irony. Mark, while you are uttering threats of Perfidious Albion, you seem to be missing a trick here. One, this is not a speech showing respect towards anybody, it is the talk of the playground bully. Two, it is not in the gift of the EU to hold the UK hostage. All the poor bastards are trying to do is flatten themselves against the wall trying to get out of the way of the spinning wreckage. They’re desperately keen to not let wankers like you lot blame them for the clusterfuck. They have put up with thirty years of Brits blaming them for this that and the other, and as far as they are concerned, it can’t end soon enough. But if you want their agreement to something, ie a deal, then they get a say in what the deal looks like.
The UK could walk away tomorrow with no deal. The reason this is not happening, Mark you odious dimwit, is because your lot haven’t convinced Her Majesty’s Government that your preferred course of action is a good thing to do.
- Somewhere in the back of my mind I am sure I have seen a picture of this cartoon described here, in some idle surfing at work 😉 I was going to dredge it out for this. Either my Google-fu has faded since 2012, or the added detritus of several years has made it unfindable ↩
- They’re not European in outlook, and they don’t do research because they know what the answer is before they start. They are a Group of Spaffing Spivs I guess. ↩
- Or Paul Samuelson. Whatever. ↩